Believers and non-believers in one family

József Attila’s poem titled Két hexameter goes like this: “Why should I be honest? They’ll find out anyway! / Why shouldn’t I be honest? They’ll find out anyway.” Many times I think of this poem when a friend asks me what to do for the conversion of their non-believing relatives. I rewrite the verses of József Attila for myself like this: Why would you talk about your faith? Why wouldn’t you talk about your faith? The question is not whether to talk or not, the question is how.

Not every relative sympathizes with us

The situation is that in many families, there are those who have a dislike towards their relatives who go to church. In such cases, it may also be that there is a problem with the one attending church. I have no words for them right now. Those who regularly tidy up their messes with God should read this post. Those who are enthusiastic, who like to talk about Jesus, but receive many verbal slaps for it, should keep reading. I want to convey to them with a sentence from the Gospel of Matthew, how not to do it. “Do not give what is holy to dogs; and do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample them under foot and turn and maul you.” (Mt 7, 6) Certainly, no one thinks that their cousin or brother-in-law is like a pig. But Jesus warns us to only tell our experiences of God and our spiritual experiences, the real spiritual pearls, to believing people. Because if we don’t do this, they will tear us apart. They will mock or sneer at us. And we don’t need to expose ourselves to that. But then how should we speak?

The indirect method and the necessity of confession

One time on Mária Rádió, one of the volunteer reporters interviewed the other volunteer presenters about how they bear witness to their faith in their broadcasts. The presenter who deals with psychology replied, “indirectly”. When we are at a family gathering, we should behave with love first and foremost. We should listen to others, offer a little physical help to those in need. If someone asks for a glass of water, we should give it to them without hesitation. We should not raise religious topics, we should not rave about the miracles of the Virgin Mary. We should bear witness indirectly. But if someone asks if they would help with infertility through artificial insemination, then we must say that our concern is that they usually fertilize more than one egg at a time, but generally only one person is born, what will happen to the rest…

They don’t like prophets

If you think that they don’t like prophets, then remember the story of Herod and Saint John the Baptist. Be aware of this thought: “Herod feared John; he knew he was an upright and holy man, and gave him protection. When he heard him speak, he was greatly perplexed; and yet he liked to listen to him.” (Mt6, 19-20) If you have love within you and sometimes stand up firmly but gently for your faith, believe me, they will gladly listen to you. Maybe what you can do for your non-believing relatives, even your child, could be summarized in one sentence, but a great saint, Augustine, said it a long time ago instead of me: “Love and do as you like!”.

Rákóczi Piroska